SOL- April 14, 2015 Living Alone

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April 14, 2015

I have been thinking a lot about living alone lately- mostly because I do live alone. Moving here I was choosing my first ever alone place. After university, I shared apartments with other people until I got married. Then for years I was married and lived as two, then three, then four of us all together. Once I got divorced it was back down to three.  Then my first son went off to university, so it was down to two again. In 2011 my second son was off to university. He came home for breaks, so it was kind of a practice for living alone. Flash forward to 2014 and I was moving countries again- this time off to Malaysia and moving alone. I love the apartment I am living in and the location is just right for me, but there are real advantages and disadvantages to living alone.

I love: not needing to check schedules with anyone else, knowing the mess is all mine, doing less cooking, not having to be extra quiet if I am up early/late, not having the TV on -ever, always being able to have alone time, having my own space.

I do not love: junkier eating, always being in quiet, knowing the mess is all mine, nobody to talk to after a long day, loneliness, being lazy about decorating, it feeding on my tendencies to stay in more and work more.

When I turned 50 (two years ago) my mother noted that it looked like I would be the third generation of women in our family to live this stage of my life alone-hmm. There are definitely positives and negatives (as there is with everything)- so I just have to make the situation work to help me be the best me. My goal is to be more social, so that will help with some of the negatives.

Just a few quiet reflections here in Kuala Lumpur.

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3 thoughts on “SOL- April 14, 2015 Living Alone

  1. debbussewitz

    Erika, I admire your goal to be a year-long blogger by March. And I love this reflection. I have moved in and out of living alone with my children going off to school, home again and off again. I resonate with your lists. I find it important to develop community and friendship and to enjoy being with myself. Makes all of the difference. Thank you for leading me to think about this.

    Reply
  2. Terje

    Writing allows reflection. I like how you weigh between the pro-s and con-s of living alone reaching the conclusion that you have to make the best out of the situation. I like the phrase you used: help me be the best me.

    Reply

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